The War For My Mind Series Day 5

Have you ever said, "But I just can’t help it." Maybe your words are similar to, "Yeah, that might work for you but not for me, I need ..." You may even tell yourself, "I okay. I don't really need to change the way I think. It's just the way I am." Sound familiar?

The great news is no one has to settle for these excuses. Just tell yourself I get to change so my life can be transformed. I get to make new decisions starting today. Here's another tip, You don't have to settle for anything. Go for what you want. Just think about it Michael Phelps said he would win 8 golden medals in the 2008 Olympics in Beijing and as I and the rest of the world watched. He did exactly that. In spite of those that said how hard it would be to make it happen. What he would have to do and how great his opponents were. Even when Serbian-American swimmer Milorad Čavić caused a minor stir when he said it would be "good" if Phelps lost. "It'd be good for him if he loses. It would be nice if historians talk about Michael Phelps winning seven gold medals and losing the eight to 'some guy.' I'd like to be that guy." Michael Phelps did not lose sight of what his ultimate goal was. as history would have it. August 17, 2008. I sat in my living room with my mother cheering him on as he would his eighth gold medal.

Day 5

The Problem:

Most of our thinking is habitual. Thousands of thoughts flow through our minds daily. Then when we had the fact that as we come into contact with others, our minds are communicating with each other and the vibes go from thousands to tens of thousands, that is a lot of thoughts. Now add to this that there are people who are more than eager to bring gossip, bad emotions, bad news and useless information to you. Well you get the picture. 

Now, listen to this, it takes no effort to think a bad thought. However, on the other hand it takes much effort to think a good thought. As you start to resist these bad thought, understand there is a war going on for your mind. It does not get easier because you have said I am going to do this. It requires you to force this into a habit. You must be conscious of your thoughts from this point on. 

The Solution:

1. Stay Active. Don't let your thoughts happen without your knowledge

2. Have positive quotes, scriptures, sayings, movies, books, songs and most important people around you

3. Mediate on good things. Find something you love that makes you smile and when things are getting hectic begin to mediate on that.

4. Have a center. Find that one things that centers you. Use your spiritual connection to God. Understand the power that comes with understanding his will for your life and his love for you. If you are not a Christian, find something greater than you that will balance you. Let me tell you there is nothing better than God for this.

5. Remember we are eternal beings living in a temporal world. This means, the world around us will change but we are constant and connected to the source of life. Remember the seasons change, you get older, but what's important remains the same.

6. Negative thoughts do not originate with you. They have a source and if you change the source you can change the thoughts.

7. Choose to think!!!

The Benefit:

It is important to remember once you make the choice to think right, to think positive and not focus on the negative. It’s not a once in for all thought and that is it. You never have to worry about it again. It is a daily active plan to make your thoughts stay positive no matter what comes your way. The great thing about this is you will be rewarded greatly for it. Those that are near you will benefit also. 

This is just a sample of a new coaching program that I am developing. I will be offering it on my website as a complimentary 30 day course. On May 1, 2012, you will be able to get all 30-days delivered to your email box. I hope you will take the time to sign up for this thought-provoking and stimulating course. 

Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group

The War For My Mind Series Day 4

When I first started my business about 3 years ago, I really thought that the masses would flock to me because I had the answer to their problems. They would want to do business with me because; I was going to be the best thing next to sliced bread. Well, after struggling for two years, I begun to think, who am I kidding. With a handful of clients, fighting to get paid on time and trying to stay above the whirlpool of sinking sand called bills. I was feeling a bit defeated and overwhelmed to say the least. I questioned if I was doing what I was called to do. I questioned if I had the answers for anyone including myself. I was ready to throw in the towel and go back to corporate America with my tail between my legs and my head lowered between my shoulders. As I started updating my resume, I could hear the voices of the nay-sayers, laughing and taunting me with their, "I knew she could not do it.", "I told her so", "Who did she think she was anyway, tony Robbins? John Maxwell? Silly silly little girl." 

I began to fall into depression, I did not want to eat, I slept all day, I began to not follow up on potential clients. Things were pretty bad. My dreams were slipping away and I had no desire to fight for them. I was giving up. Then I was reminded why I was doing it, a quote by Winston Churchill simply said "Never, Never, Never Give Up." This stared at me in my face on my Facebook page. I went to find this speech to read his words and I knew I could not give up. 

Day 4:

The Problem:

People will be people. They will say whatever comes to their minds. They will support you today and turn on you tomorrow. They will flatter you on Monday, curse you on Tuesday, steal from you on Wednesday, lie to you on Thursday, smile in your face on Friday, eat your food on Saturday, and pray for you on Sunday. Then the cycle repeats. The real point is this; no one can make your dreams and aspirations come true but you. However, you have to truly understand what it is you are meant to do and why.

Many times we allow others to tell us who we are and what we are capable of accomplishing. Then there is a little tiny voice on the inside of us telling us we can do more than that but we suppress that voice and settle for less. When we realize that we are not happy we sink into a giant hole of despair. 

The Solution:

1. Never Never Never Give Up

2. Understand that your dreams do make a promise that it will be easy or come naturally to you. You will have to fight for it.

3. Nothing worth having is going to just drop into your life. Look at diamonds, you have to dig for them.

4. Be careful who you share your time, energy and dreams with. There are dream killers out there in visionary clothing. Meaning, there are those that would steal your dreams to mash them and kill them but they look like those that are there to help.

5. Remove negative energy out of your personal space. Put a flowing foundation, a moving picture or something that reminds you to keep going in your work space.

6. When you think it's slipping away, remember why you are doing it. This is helpful. Have your vision written in its entirety. Have this typed out and put into a presentation that will impress you every time you see it. This should be your dream at its completion. What it will look like, feel like, who will be there, etc... See the completed picture and write it out. EVERY WORD!

7. Don't kill your own dreams. You were created (born) for this.

The Benefit:

When you can see the finish line, it is easier to stay your course. Watch a 100 meter race. The runners keep their eye on the finish line. They don't look to the left or right. They are not distracted by the crowds yelling and cheering them on. They are focused on one thing, getting to the finish line. The same is true when you have purpose and understand why you are living YOUR life.

Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group

The War For My Mind Series Day 3

I have learned an invaluable lesson: Whatever I focus on, is what I get no matter if I am wanting something different or not.  Now this simple lesson continues to teach me daily. Listen wherever we put our energy, our attention, our meaning for existence, that is what we get and that is what will start to develop. 

Try It: Think about your favorite ice cream flavor. If you done have a favorite ice cream flavor, you can use mine Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey. It has a base of creamy banana ice cream blended with walnuts and chunks of chocolate fudge. Just think about that ice cream. Think about it, that smooth creamy substance chilled just right sitting on a cone or in a bowl, maybe even a nice triple scoop banana split with the works. Can you see it? If you are like me you can even taste it and feel it sliding down your throat. mmm... how refreshing. Okay now let's get to business

Day 3:

The Problem:

When we focus on something, our thoughts will stir our desire and emotions, and we will make a decision to follow them. This is true whether it is good (positive) or bad (negative) thoughts, whether or not they will cause good or bad reactions in our lives. So it is true if we focus on negative thoughts and things we will become negative people. Destroying everything we come in contact with. We lose our joy and our lives become miserable and empty. Just to think it all started with our thoughts.

What really gets us stuck is; we don't always realize that the problems we are experiencing right now in our lives, we have created by our own stinking thinking. We have chosen to imprison ourselves by what we choose to think about. You may be experiencing depression, loss of appetite, lack of drive, discouragement, sadness, and wonder where did it come from, why do you feel this way? Examine your thoughts, you will find that you are feeding these emotions.

The Solution:

1. Examine your thoughts.

2. What do you read? What do you watch on TV, What movies? What do you listen to on the radio? All these sources can cause negative thoughts to develop.

3. Choose what you will think about.

4. Activate a grateful list. Write down everything you are grateful for in your life and focus on the positive. Even in bad situations there is something to be grateful for.

5. Each day tell the people you love the most why you love them without saying the same thing you have already said.

6. Look for the silver lining in all situations

7. Don't let anyone bring negative gossip, conversation, or bad emotions around you.

The Benefit:

When you learn to focus on the positive, you will start to see more of the positive happening in your life. You will begin to realize that life is worth living and your dreams can be achieved. If you catch yourself slipping... Laugh at yourself and start again. Tell the truth, you are still thinking about that ice cream, huh? I know, I think I will go get a scope now. :) Happy thoughts.

Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group

The War For Your Mind Series Day 2

Many of us deal with our own misconceptions of what is reality for us. We find ourselves believing lies we tell ourselves based on assumptions we have made about others. Now this is interesting because we are the same ones championing the statement, "That's why you should never assume things" or "You know what they say about assumptions"

Recently, I had a client that came to me with a need to be free of negative thoughts. They were experiencing depression and wanted to be free. The whole first month of coaching were riding them of the assumptions that were made about life, God, their family, friends and co-workers.

Day 2:

The Problem:

Many of us, if we are honest with ourselves, have thousands of assumptions running through our heads daily. We think we are not loved by family and friends, we believe that things are done intentional especially when they hurt us, we try to figure others out before they get the upper hand on us and the list goes on and on. We are a suspicious breed. We are suspicious of others and they are suspicious of us. Here's the deal, if we can convince ourselves that we are worthless, useless, and can’t do anything right it does not take a rocket scientist to know that we will never accomplish what we are trying to accomplish.

If we spend our time fighting against our creative nature, not accepting our flaws as well as our strong points, we have defeated ourselves and there is no one else to blame for that. There are other elements that get in our way too. When it comes to the way we think. We can let outside influences nibble away at our resolve. For example: Our parents always said, you will never amount to anything, or maybe someone said you were stupid, you did not have what it takes...etc. 

We allow our thoughts to build fortresses in our mind. We start to build our lives on these fortresses and they become our core values. They become what we believe more than anything else. This is why many of us will not go after our dreams, or take a risk that may cause our lives to develop in a different way.  We allow our thoughts to form our words and our words shape our actions. Our actions then rule our lives. We are in a vicious circle. No wonder we can achieve the things we keep telling ourselves we want. The things that we long for, wish for and truly desire. We have shut down our ability to create anything but what we believe we can have. Unfortunately for us, what we believe we can have is absolutely NOTHING!

The Solution:

1. Stop lying to yourself. Realize that you are not seeing things clearly

2. Make a decision today that you will only believe the truth.

3. Find out the truth of the matter. Get in connection with people that are determined to accomplish their goals and thus will inspire you to do the same.

4. Write out everything. When you see yourself writing lies. BURN them. This action will start to cause the lies to do them same in your mind. (Figuratively) When you tell yourself a lie that lie will go up in smoke just like the ones that you burned. 

5. Replace the lies with the truth. Let the truth come from everywhere, do not limit how the truth comes to you. 

6. Remember yourself often of YOUR truth.

7. Whenever you feel like you may speak a lie, make sure tell the truth instead.

The Benefit:

One of my favorite books is The Bible. In The Bible there is a scripture that speak volumes in this area. Romans 12:1-2. In short what it says is that you cannot be conformed by the way the world thinks but you have to be transformed by the renewing of your mind. This transformation will cause you to understand the plan for your life. Knowing this plan is your reasonable service. The whole point is simply this; once you can conqueror what you think you can conquer what you can do.

Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group

The War For My Mind Series Day 1

I believe that we should find inspiration from all sources. As we journey through this world, we need to understand that our thoughts, words and actions create our reality. As I think about this I am reminded of why it is important to understand how our mind functions. Over the next few days, I am going to share some life lessons with you. Don't worry, I am always growing and will not run out of valuable content to for. Let's call this...The War For My Mind.

Okay so we have best laid plans. We have planned out our life and what we will do if and when. What happens when your plans fail? What happens when you do something that you had not planned on doing? Do we just give up? I think not.

Here's how this series will work, I will talk about some tough things that I have learned and I aim to make you think about your life. More importantly I want you to think about your thoughts, your words, your actions and finally the results from all these. Then I want you to take action. It's a war for your mind and you have to be fully engaged in this war or you will lose. Ready? Let's Go

Day 1:

The Problem:

I am convinced that people don't really want to hurt each other. We don't wake up in the morning thinking, who can I hurt today? Okay well most people don't. Let's deal with the majority of the people. Sounds fair? Good. So we wake up with the intention to make the day a great one by achieving our goals and while we are at it helping our fellow humans accomplish a goal or two also. However, somehow, during the day, a decision is made and that decision requires an action and those actions bring about words and by the end of the day, we are scratching our heads wondering how that all happened.

Does this sound familiar: "how could you say that?' "How could you do that?" "What did I ever do to you to make you do this?" I am sure a few more come to your mind even now. What I have learned is even with our best laid plans, we can get side tracked and we can hurt others. Sometimes it's selfish and intentional and sometimes it's not.  We just needed someone to listen to us, someone to love us, we were missing something in our lives and saw an opportunity to get it.

What we focus on becomes a major part of our thoughts. When we start to feel empty, or in need of something, it is our human nature to seek it out. We have plans to take the family on a vacation. We start looking into spots that we will enjoy and then your wife forgets to make your dinner. Or your son does not take out the trash. Your daughter wrecks the car. Your boss decides not to give you the promotion etc... We start to focus on the changes we are experiencing. We start to feel underappreciated even misused. Maybe more small things happen, you still try to overlook them but you are becoming more aware of how much you would prefer to hang with your friends than spend time with your family. The vicious cycle is in play it ends with you having a major family brawl and the vacation gets cancelled.

Now after a time of calming, you find out there were legit reasons certain events occurred. This knowledge would have changed how you processed the actions of the others. It did not make it better but it did now make sense. You feel like a heel for jumping to conclusions but no one in your family will look you in the eye. Even though you plan a quick get away, it nothing compared to what it could have been.

The Solution:

1. Notice when you start to feel a certain way. (Empty, neglected, misunderstood, etc...)

2. Express your needs immediately

3. Listen with your heart and not your head; hear what is not being said in the midst of what is being said.

4. Step away from the problem and come back when your emotions are not raw.

5. Look for the solution that will bring peace and not just completion

6. Include all parties in the solution.

7. Never speak out of anger. There are ways to get your point across without using angry and hurtful words. Remember, this is a person that you love, respect and need.

The Benefit:

When you take a moment to understand that we can blow things out of portion when we assume what others think or mean, then it is easier for us to hear what they have to say. Conversing with others to get an understanding is always better than burning a bridge. Even though the bridge can be rebuilt, it will never be the same. This way, you preserve your relationships and you are able to stick to your plans to push forward on purpose.

Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group

Why Living a Life of Gratitude Can Make You Happy by Leo Babauta

“If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.” – Meister Eckhart

Many days, I try to humble myself and hold a 2-minute gratitude session. I simply sit or kneel, with no distractions, close my eyes, and think about what I’m grateful for and who I’m grateful for.

I don’t do it every day, but let me tell you, on the days I do it, it makes me very happy.

Why should that be? Why should the simple act of thinking about who and what I’m grateful for make such a big difference in my life?

Just a few reasons:

• Because it reminds you of the positive things in your life. It makes you happy about the people in your life, whether they’re loved ones or just a stranger you met who was kind to you in some ways.
• Because it turns bad things into good things. Having problems at work? Be grateful you have work. Be grateful you have challenges, and that life isn’t boring. Be grateful that you can learn from these challenges. Be thankful they make you a stronger person.
• Because it reminds you of what’s important. It’s hard to complain about the little things when you give thanks that your children are alive and healthy. It’s hard to get stressed out over paying bills when you are grateful there is a roof over your head.
• Because it reminds you to thank others. I’ll talk about this more below, but the simple act of saying “thank you” to someone can make a big difference in that person’s life. Calling them, emailing them, stopping by to say thank you … just taking that minute out of your life to tell them why you are grateful toward them is important to them. People like being appreciated for who they are and what they do. It costs you little, but makes someone else happy. And making someone else happy will make you happy.

What do I give thanks for, privately, in my little gratitude session? It varies every day. I thank all the readers of this site, for the encouragement you have given me, for the donations you’ve made that have made me that much closer to realizing my dreams, for the criticism you’ve given that has made this site better … for the time you’ve given me, just reading the articles when you have the chance.

I thank my loved ones, for all they do to me. I thank strangers who’ve shown me little acts of kindness. I thank God, for the life he’s given me. I thank people around the world for the things they’ve done to make the world better. I thank myself, for things that I’ve done (it’s important to recognize your own accomplishments).

It's A War For My Righteous Mind

I don’t know if you remember the song by Elvis Presley called “Suspicious minds.” Well the chorus simply says, “We can’t go on together with suspicious minds. And we can’t build our dreams on suspicious minds.” So what does that have to do with war for your righteous mind…Everything. Even though he was talking about a love gone bad, many of us are trapped in our own snares. We tell ourselves that we can’t do things, that our dreams are impossible, no one has ever done it before, Who do we think we are to even attempt such a feat. I believe that is what a suspicious mind looks like. It puts ideas and thoughts into play that slowly but deliberately eat away at the hope we have of accomplishing our dreams.

We find ourselves not trusting even our own actions, suspicious minds. Can you see the war forming even in your own life? What lies are you telling yourself? What deceit are you forcing your heart to believe? It’s time you understand. More than a battle is going on in your mind. It’s all out war. There are two sides, positive and negative. Let me let you in on a secret, the negative side is winning. Why is that? We have given the negative more ammunition than the positive side. Once in a while we will win a battle against a negative thought only to fall prey to its evil scheme all over again.

Is there any help? Absolutely. The bible says that we are to be transformed by the renewing of our mind (Romans 12:2). This means that if we allow things to go on as they are, there is no way we can achieve our goals and aspirations. We have allowed our thoughts to be taken captive. They are prisoners of war and our dreams are killed in action. It is time we step up and take responsibility for our thoughts and change how we see our current situations.

Renewing our mind is a daily action that we must take. When we see ourselves falling prey to negative thoughts, we must remember “I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13) More importantly we must live by the scripture that says, “As a man thinketh in his heart so is he.” (Proverbs 23:7). How do you get your righteous mind? You have to renew your mind daily so your life can be transformed and your destiny realized. Use your mind, free your dreams.

Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group

What Were You Thinking?

Our thoughts matter so much. I means jut think about it any thing that is going to happen is first a thought in our mind. the thought really does count because what you think determines what you become. Your actions are based on your thoughts. So what is the really deal behind what you are thinking?

Most of us tend to be held captive by toxic and damaging thoughts. Rather than focusing our thoughts on positive situations and good vibes, we dig out the wrong, negative and disabling thoughts. We must understand that dangers of toxic thoughts and how you can replace them with the truth of the matter.

The truth is not hard to find but it isn't easy to apply. The reason being we are more readily able to accept the toxic thoughts than the positive. To battle against your toxic thoughts, you must identify and reject them. You have to remember this the battle against your toxic thoughts is not physical. It's spiritual and emotional.

today think about what are some of the toxic thoughts in your life. Write them down and then write a new thought that is positive to combat it.

Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group

Negative vs Positive Actions

To ensure your motives are powerful and sustainable, make sure that they are in a positive form. Meaning you can focus on the negative and expect the opposite to happen. You must switch your mindset. Although negative motivations may fuel you for a little while, they quickly run out of steam, and people tend to respond poorly to them. You may really desire to get out of debt or change bad habits, or even start a healthy relationship, but those negative emotions will only drain your energy and hurt your effectiveness to make good decisions in the end. Stop focusing on what you don't want in your life and start to focus on what you DO!

Listen, Have you seen the movie Psycho. In this movie Norman Bates ultimate goal was NOT to kill the guest in his hotel, it was actually to please his mother. Now that is a positive intention right. We all want Mom's approval, however in wanting to please his mother, he thought it meant hurting others. ( Okay i admit a bit extreme, but really take heed to the comparisons). In trying to use negative emotions to get positive results we are just like Norman Bates, a mixed up and confused psychopath killing our dreams. Get it it?

With a little work, any negative action can be turned into a positive counterpart. You must think of ways to re-position your action in a positive light. Here are some examples you can try:

Instead of arguing; you could negotiate
Instead of insisting; you could compel
Instead of demanding; you could urge
Instead of tracking down; you could pursue
Instead of pushing; you could encourage


Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group

What Is Your Real Reason You Do What You Do?

Recently I was asked, Why do you do what you do? At first I started with my usual answer and then something deep inside me rose up and I shifted in the midst of my sentence and started talking from a place so deep inside me that I become emotional. What i realized from that moment is that why I do what I do is more than I just want to help people discover their life calling and purpose. It is more than helping a person with low-sel;f esteem realize that they can be and do more than they ever imagined. That makes me smile and feel all warm inside but the real reason I do what I do is more than that. It is simply  about me. It's what I call, from my selling Mary Kay days, "My I-Story".

When you stop and think about it. You do what you do because of a change in your life. Somewhere, somehow, you made a transformation in your life that alter your reason for living. It changed you path and caused you to want to share that special feeling with others. You wanted everyone to know that feeling that self worth, that love, that success, etc was possible. I finish this blog with a speech from Tony Robbins a few years back at a TED Event: "Why we do what we do - June 2006"

Let me tell you what they are. First one: certainty. Now, these are not goals or desires, these are universal. Everyone needs certainty that they can avoid pain and at least be comfortable. Now, how do you get it? Control everybody? Develop a skill? Give up? Smoke a cigarette? And if you got totally certain, ironically, even though we all need that --like if you're not certain about your health, or your children, or money, you don't think about much. You're not sure if the ceiling's going to hold up, you're not going to listen to any speaker. But, while we go for certainty differently, if we get total certainty, we get what? What do you feel if you're certain? You know what's going to happen, when it's going to happen, how it's going to happen -- what would you feel? Bored out of your minds. So, God, gave us a second human need, which is uncertainty. We need variety. We need surprise. 

So, variety is important. Have you ever rented a video or a film that you've already seen? Who's done this? All right. Why are you doing it? You're certain it's good because you read it before, saw it before, but you're hoping it's been long enough you've forgotten, that there's variety. 

Third human need, critical: significance. We all need to feel important, special, unique. You can get it by making more money. You can do it by being more spiritual. You can do it by getting yourself in a situation where you put more tattoos and earrings in places humans don't want to know. Whatever it takes. The fastest way to do this, if you have no background, no culture, no belief and resources or resourcefulness, is violence. If I put a gun to your head and I live in the 'hood, instantly I'm significant. Zero to 10. How high? 10. How certain am I that you're going to respond to me? 10. How much uncertainty? Who knows what's going to happen next? Kind of exciting. Like climbing up into a cave and doing that stuff all the way down there. Total variety and uncertainty. And it's significant, isn't it? So you want to risk your life for it. So that's why violence has always been around and will be around unless we have a consciousness change as a species. Now, you can get significance a million ways, but to be significant, you've got to be unique and different.

Here's what we really need: connection and love -- fourth need. We all want it. Most people settle for connection because love's too scary. Don't want to get hurt. Who here has ever been hurt in an intimate relationship?  And you're going to get hurt again.Aren't you glad you came to this positive visit? But here's what's true -- we need it. We can do it through intimacy, through friendship, through prayer, through walking in nature. If nothing else works for you, get a dog. Don't get a cat. Get a dog, because if you leave for two minutes, it's like you've been gone for six months when you show back up again five minutes later, right? 

Now, these first four needs, every human finds a way to meet. Even if you lie to yourself, you need to have split personalities. But the last two needs -- the first four needs are called the needs of the personalities, is what I call it -- the last two are the needs of the spirit. And this is where fulfillment comes. You won't get fulfillment from the first four. You'll figure a way -- smoke, drink, do whatever -- to meet the first four, but the last two -- number five: you must grow. We all know the answer here. If you don't grow, you're what? If a relationship's not growing, if a business is not growing, if you're not growing, it doesn't matter how much money you have, how many friends you have, how many people love you, you feel like hell. And the reason we grow, I believe, is so we have something to give of value.

Because the sixth need is to contribute beyond ourselves. Because we all know, corny as it sounds, the secret to living is giving. We all know life's not about me; it's about we. This culture knows that. This room knows that. And it's exciting. When you see Nicholas up here talking about his $100 computer, the most passionate exciting thing is: here's a genius, but he's got a calling now. You can feel the difference in him and it's beautiful. And that calling can touch other people. In my own life, my life was touched because when I was 11 years old, Thanksgiving, no money, no food -- we're not going to starve, but my father was totally messed up. My mom was letting him know how bad he messed up. And somebody came to the door and delivered food. My father made three decisions. I know what they were briefly. His focus was: "This is charity. What does it mean? I'm worthless. What've I got to do? Leave my family." Which he did. The time was one of the most painfulexperiences of life. My three decisions gave me a different path. I said, "Focus on: 'there's food'" -- what a concept, you know. 

Second -- but this is what changed my life, this is what shaped me as a human being -- "Somebody's gift. I don't even know who it is." My father always said, "No one gives a s***." And all of a sudden, somebody I don't know, they're not asking for anything, they're just giving our family food, looking out for us. It made me believe this: "What does it mean that strangers care?" And what that made me decide is, if strangers care about me and my family, I care about them. What am I going to do? I'm going to do something to make a difference. So, when I was 17, I went out one day on Thanksgiving. It was my target for years to have enough money to feed two families. The most fun thing I ever did in my life, the most moving. Then next year I did four. I didn't tell anybody what I was doing. Next year eight. I wasn't doing it for brownie points, but after eight, I thought, I could use some help. 

So sure enough, I went out and what did I do? I got my friends involved and I grew companies and then I got 11 companies and I built the foundation. Now, 18 years later, I'm proud to tell you, last year we fed two million people in 35 countries through our foundation, all during the holidays: Thanksgiving, Christmas -- (Applause) -- in all the different countries around the world. It's been fantastic. Thank you. So, I don't tell you that to brag; I tell you because I'm proud of human beings, because they get excited to contribute once they've had the chance to experience it, not talk about it.

So, finally -- and I'm about out of time -- the target that shapes you -- here's what's different about people. We have the same needs, but are you a certainty freak? Is that what you value most, or uncertainty? This man here couldn't be a certainty freak if he climbed through those caves. Are you driven by significance or love? We all need all six, but whatever your lead system is, tilts you in a different direction. And as you move in a direction, you have a destination or destiny. The second piece is the map. Think of that as the operating system that tells you how to get there. And some people's map is: "I'm going to save lives even if I die for other people," and they're firemen. Somebody else is: "I'm going to kill people to do it." They're trying to meet the same needs of significance, right? They want to honor God or honor their family, but they have a different map.

The last piece is emotion. I'd say one of the parts of the map is like time. Some people's idea of a long time is 100 years. Somebody else's is three seconds, which is what I have. And the last one I've already mentioned, that fell to you. If you've got a target and you've got a map and let's say -- I can't use Google because I love Macs and they haven't made it good for Macs yet -- so if you use MapQuest -- how many have made this fatal mistake of using MapQuest at some time? You use this thing and you don't get there. Well, imagine if your beliefs guarantee you can never get to where you want to go?(Laughter)

The last thing is emotion. Now, here's what I'll tell you about emotion. There are 6,000 emotions that we all have words for in the English language, which is just a linguistic representation, right, that changes by language. But if your dominant emotions -- if I had more time, I have 20,000 people or 1,000, and I have them write down all the emotions that they experience in an average week, and I gave them as long as they needed, and on one side they write empowering emotions, the other's disempowering -- guess how many emotions people experience? Less than 12. And half of those make them feel bad....

What I walk away from this speech hearing is that I most know what drives me to do what i do. I have to know what i am focusing on, what it means to me and what i am going to do about it. Once I can grasp that then I know my real reason for doing what I do. The same is true for life or business. Get to know the real reason you do what you do.


Be Empowered
Coach Linda Hillman
Copyright 2012 Destined 2 B U Empowerment Group